Chapter 5: Shampoo When You Wish Shampoo was usually a very light-hearted girl, and it had been long since she had really felt sad. Now, however, she did. The Tendo mother individually didn't really pose a greater threat to her plans of marrying Ranma than anyone else, but it was yet another obstacle on a long, long list, the one that finally made it impossibly for her to even come see him. Her great-grandmother had suddenly, mysteriously, forgotten all about him, which meant that her only real source of plans, ideas and support was gone. She could only think of one person who could be responsible, but... ...Mousse was dead. He was certainly a nuisance most of the time, but dead? He sure tried hard, but the guy really couldn't hurt a fly. There was something that was really odd about the way he'd acted just before his death. Odd was also the locket he had clasped firmly in his hand when his body was found. Shampoo held it from the gold chain, studying the locket as it dangled in front of her eyes. She didn't know why, but somehow, she had a feeling it was responsible for all her recent trouble. She frowned. The locket didn't look like much, really - silver, with a small crystal, hanging from a gold chain. Mousse had dropped some cryptic hints to that effect, but Shampoo knew such a simple item couldn't, for example, grant a wish. Luckily for her, the locket really, really, really wanted to grant wishes. The amazon girl nearly jumped out of her bed, in which she was currently sitting, as her room suddenly and almost instantly filled with smoke. The smoke cleared just as swiftly as it had appeared, revealing a familiar blue shape floating in mid-room. "Ooga-booga!" the Genie shouted as he put a wide eye right next to her ample bosom, stretching his neck several feet and drooling slightly. The neck snapped back as his head assumed a slightly purplish tone. "" he told the stunned girl, in a tone that she wasn't quite sure how to interpret. Luckily, it was a Chinese dub she'd seen. Shampoo soon regained her senses. While unexpected, this was just the type of chance she needed right now. "Shampoo get wish now, yes?" she asked excitedly, habit making her speak in Japanese. The blue apparition grinned. "" "" Shampoo stopped to think, but not for long. She knew what she wanted. "" "" The Genie pouted, putting on a jealous face. "" He inhaled, stretching his breast to its limit and smiling widely, perfectly white teeth glistening, reflecting the light from a non-existing lamp. Shampoo nearly giggled - she'd found the movie quite amusing, despite her great-grandmother's complaints about American rubbish - but shook her head sternly. "" The Genie sighed, looking depressed for a moment, but soon waved his hands in the familiar pattern. "" He pulled out a cellular phone from nowhere, putting it to his ear. "" He turned back to Shampoo. "" Shampoo smiled blissfully. "" "" the Genie interrupted her. " He looked at a wristwatch that wasn't there a second before. " He snaked his head around to oogle her behind for a short moment before disappearing with a flash, gone just as fast as he'd come. It was a shame she'd only gotten one - she could've had her poor husbands curse removed, or something - but still, she had to be grateful for what she got, and Shampoo's happiness now was a sharp contrast to her earlier depression. She ran downstairs to tell her great-grandmother, but found that the old-lady wasn't there. 'Probably just went to buy supplies,' Shampoo thought as she set off on foot towards the Tendo Dojo, for some reason ignoring her bike. Imagine how happy Ranma would be when he could finally reveal his true feelings for her, without having to worry about any of the usual obstacles! A part of her mind felt there was something fundamentally wrong with that thought, but she had long ago subconciously decided to shut off all communications with that area of her brain, which explained a lot about her behavior. - * - "Well, Mr. Saotome," Cologne told the panda, who sat opposite her in the otherwise empty dojo, "I don't quite recall why, but my granddaughter seems to have an infatuation with your son, and if she wants him, I'll make certain she'll get him." The panda held up a sign. "Hah!" it read. He flipped it around. "We don't have to worry about your plots anymore!" She smiled cryptically. "Are you sure?" "None of your potions will work!" The panda grinned defiantly at her, a gesture that could be defined as foolishly brave. "Good thing I wasn't going to try any potions, then." The Amazon elder pulled out a scroll from somewhere within her robes. The grin wavered slightly and a few drops of sweat appeared on the panda's forehead, but still, he was pretty sure they'd have a counter against whatever magic the scroll contained. Cologne merely smiled and shook her head. "No, no, no magic, fool. The contents of this scroll simply prove beyond doubts that some of your ancestors were Unclean. You know what that means, don't you?" Acting on instinct, the panda quickly reached out, grabbed the scroll, and tossed it down its mouth, swallowing audibly. "Look, no scroll!" a sign proclaimed. Cologne could easily have stopped him from taking the scroll, but didn't. "Are you really that stupid?" she sneered. "I have copies, and so have some of my friends ... back in China." To prove her point, she pulled out another scroll, rolling it open and shoving it into the panda's face, so he could see that she had spoken the truth. More sweat appeared, and the Panda's eyes darted desperately around the room, as if somehow seeking to escape the whole situation, but it knew it was futile. He had been beaten once and for all. "Yes, Saotome," Cologne said, smiling with a twisted sweetness that looked even more horrible on her aged face. "Being fathered by an Unclean, and thus equally Unclean himself, your son will never be able to find a wife. No matter how much love they love him, no girl can ever afford to destroy her life like that - and believe me, I will make this fact very publicly known. You Japanese have some interesting customs." The eyes stopped, finally resting on the little, ancient woman, desperately pleading for a way to make the horror, the nightmare, go away. "Of course," she continued, ignoring him, "he could marry my grand- daughter, and nobody would ever now. After all, I don't want people to know she married someone considered Unclean - they might want to stay in Japan." "And by the way," she added as she rose, crushing the faint hopes that had slowly begun forming, "I would stay away from stupid thoughts about running away if I were you. After all, I'll still have the documents, won't I?" "I..." The panda hesitated a moment before taking out a new, complete sign. "I'll go tell him." "I'll be waiting outside." Again, the sick, sweet smile appeared on the elder's ancient lips. - * - As she neared the Dojo, Shampoo spotted two familiar shapes in the distance, and increased her pace, soon meeting up with her great- grandmother and future husband. He came already? She was about to throw herself at him, announcing her love to all the world, but something stopped her. The look in his eyes. A look of hatred. The hatred of someone who's entire life had been ruined. "Come on, granddaughter," Cologne said. "We have a wedding to prepare." - * -